Remakes we don’t need to see

friday-13th-calendar-07-o.jpgHorror fans have a lot to answer for. Just when rehashed horror was waning at the box office, along came the  HALLOWEEN remake, and the audience turned it into a hit. Poor box office returns on TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE: THE BEGINNING, THE HITCHER, and THE HILLS HAVE EYES 2 were on the verge of teaching Hollywood a lesson, but that lesson is now forgotten.

Check out the evidence:

It’s hard to imagine which of these has the least potential; certainly none of them seem promising properties for a remake. In the case of NEAR DARK it’s hard to imagine any remake exceeding the original, which is a vampire-outlaw movie; it seems silly to even try. FRIGHT NIGHT was over-rated, relying too much on then-fashionable prosthetic effects, but at least it had good performances from Chris Sarandon (as the vampire) and Roddy McDowall (as horror host Stephen Vincent).

The original FRIDAY THE 13TH is the worst of the bunch, but at least in this case you know there’s room for improvement. It is also amusing to note that a literal remake is virtually impossible, because fans of Jason Voorhees will not sit still for a movie about his mom killing camp counselors while he waits in the bottom of a lake for the sequels to roll around.

About the Author

Steve Biodrowski

Cinefantastique's Los Angeles Correspondent from 1987 to 1993 and West Coast Editor from 1993 to 1999. Currently the webmaster of Cinefantastique Online, I also run a website called Hollywood Gothique that covers Halloween Horror and Sci-Fi Cinema Events in the Los Angeles area.

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